I hope everyone had a great Independence Day! I, myself, have never felt more American than I did ¬†yesterday when I was sitting in a kiddie pool, eating a Choco Taco in one hand and a steak in the other hand, drinking cheep beer, all while listening to Creedence Clearwater Revival and shooting off fireworks. If only every day could be the 4th of July…

Anyway, if you missed it, there were some rather sexual connotations in the celebratory news yesterday.

Competitive eater Joey Chestnut (a true American hero) won his 7th straight Nathan’s Hot Dog Eating Contest. But the real news comes with the number of hot dogs Chestnut was able to down. 69! That’s right, the new record for number of hot dogs eaten in 10 minutes is probably the funniest number you could pick. Especially when considering that hot dogs look a lot like penises.

hot dog penis

So while you were watching your local fireworks last night did you see any shaped like a penis? I’m pretty sure these things are supposed to come out in the form of hearts, but it’s much funnier to imagine them as giant, fiery dicks.

penis firework

Or maybe someone you know had the misfortune of attempting to make this cake. I’m pretty sure they’re supposed to be fireworks, but come on…really? This isn’t even close.

penis cake

For more sex-filled 4th of July action check out my co-worker’s,¬†@emmmmja, post showing what some different porn stars were up to yesterday. It starts out with one of my favorites, April O’Neil!

Happy 4th of July 2011 from HotMovies.com

Asylum is definitely on point this 4th of July weekend! They posted pictures of their favorite Stars and Stripes- which happen to be on bikini’s.

See the rest of their best Stars and Stripes Bikinis.

Asylum is definitely on point this 4th of July weekend! They posted pictures of their favorite Stars and Stripes- which happen to be on bikini’s.

See the rest of their best Stars and Stripes Bikinis.

Asylum is definitely on point this 4th of July weekend! They posted pictures of their favorite Stars and Stripes- which happen to be on bikini’s.

See the rest of their best Stars and Stripes Bikinis.


Watch these sluts get banged on the beach! You might get sand in your ass but it’s worth it because these whores suck and fuck cock like pros! They get down in the sand and get dirty! They get on top of that cock and ride it until they are screaming in ecstasy! You’ll see girls fucking themselves with huge dildos too! Great pussy licking on the beach! Enjoy!

This video is perfect for this 4th of July 4 day weekend. Hopefully you had this much fun at the beach.

Check out the Free Gallery

Being out in the hot sun goes hand in hand with the Fourth of July Holiday and I wanted to offer some suggestions to the men who will be outside all weekend:

Can you think of a better thing to wear on Independence day than a Flag print G-String? If that doesn’t suit you, you can always try the Flag Print Vest.

Source: ABC Underwear

Being out in the hot sun goes hand in hand with the Fourth of July Holiday and I wanted to offer some suggestions to the men who will be outside all weekend:

Can you think of a better thing to wear on Independence day than a Flag print G-String? If that doesn’t suit you, you can always try the Flag Print Vest.

Source: ABC Underwear

Being out in the hot sun goes hand in hand with the Fourth of July Holiday and I wanted to offer some suggestions to the men who will be outside all weekend:

Can you think of a better thing to wear on Independence day than a Flag print G-String? If that doesn’t suit you, you can always try the Flag Print Vest.

Source: ABC Underwear